Scattered Thoughts

 Needing less but wanting more.

The seasons document a life.

Prayers bring peace through hope. 

Because I can. 

The seasons capture time through memory.

The perfect brings both excitement and peace.

Every time I look at the night sky I feel closer to you,

knowing there are only one set of stars above us.

You only have one great love all the rest is just wannabe's 

The waterfall holds secrets that have only been heard by the heart.

I have learned to shield my heart by preventing expectations.

The words are written for my intended audience...self.

I have run away more times than most without ever moving my feet.

The whole others have it worse never changes ones own story.

How we remember is unique to each person.

I forgive but as the saying goes I never forget.

There are only so many emotions but so many ways to express them.

Experiencing that one great love is enough to see me through the day.

Souls do connect.

I've seen you in my dream a thousand times.

I am okay

I plan on traveling because there is a lot I wanna do and see.

The funny thing is I am not alone because you are imbedded 

deep in my heart.

Life is short eat a brownie. 

I am worthy.

Red flags are the signs you see but fail to believe.

The child in me still lives on.

Love taught me how much caring in its most simplistic form means.

Sometimes I am afraid to dream. 

Relived

 I have relived the words

through a thousand rhymes,

they brought to life this 

troubled heart of mine. 

It made sense and

was certainly clear, 

of what we felt and

what we shared.

Time will pass 

and I'll be gone, 

but he words of love

will find their song. 

It took a  lifetime 

that is so true 

but like a clear day

the truth came thru.

The lessons learned,

a soul set free 

and a story filled

with memories.

Loving, caring, sharing too

just to name a few, 

for I felt mixed with needs

taught me to believe.

You can set the stage

and fake a smile, 

but in the night the

stars do wow!

For they know 

the truth behold,

that real love never

gets old. 

Our flesh crossed a path

connected with love and laughs, 

music, song and mystical joy

continued to toy.

As I lay here in the early morn

my heart is really quite torn,

if not for the chapters of life

but most certainly to make it right.

Sometimes fear ruled the day

in a angry hurtful way, 

reality once more set in 

canceling out where dreams

came in.

 

What I have learned

 Unconditional love is rare ...everyone places conditions on a relationship. 

Even forever has its limitations. 

You are always alone in thought as everyone has a different idea of " what is" 

They say " the older you get the faster time goes by" But I realize time is going by fast for everyone, even young people are noticing how quickly time is flying by.

Broken hearts never heal, they scar over. 

If it brings you joy you should keep it 

maybe that is why a lot of people choose to be alone.

Living and being alive are quite different, 

I know a lot of people in my life who have been 

a live but have yet to live. 

I was once given this advice, 

" I can throw you a rope but you need to climb it"

that might be true but it wouldn't hurt if someone 

helped by pulling the rope up a little. 

We only live on as long as someone remembers us, 

maybe that is why I have put so much time into my family tree. 

Two people loving the same way is rare .

Screaming in silence is louder than any sound

but few people stop to recognize or listen. 

I am not frightened by the thought of death, 

but by the reality that at this time of my life its 

inevitably soon. 

The great push or shove is of our own doing 

but a little help never hurt.

People think animals aren't smart but we expect 

them to learn our language. We are not going

around learning how to speak dog or chicken. 

We never let go of childhood we learn more in 

a few years than we will ever learn as an adult.

Family is not a Normal Rockwell painting. 

No matter where we travel , how near or far

we take the person in the mirror and when you 

look in that mirror you have to like what is looking back.

There is always a beginning and a ending. 

We are much more vulnerable than we 

think we are. 

The galaxy is infinite and we matter

very little to it. 

Real friendship never lets go.

Women want to be held to the same regard as men, 

they fail to realize they are just that women . 

Forever is in the memory of those who believe.

I have experienced more than some less than others. 

I've climbed hills but considering the barriers

those hills were mountains. 

I miss my father the most, 

he taught me the most about life and 

yet I had to experience, trip , fall and 

get back up to understand where he 

was coming from.

No matter where or how we choose our burial 

we all end up ashes. 

Hanging on to a love that doesn't love back

is a waste of life. 

Dear friend said '"you didn't ask so you didn't get"

I am learning how true that is. 

That no one is ever happy, When it rains they want 

sunshine and when it's sunny they want the air conditioner. 

My father use to say that " a man puts his pants on one 

leg at a time. " I tried to prove him wrong and put my

feet in at the exact same time. 

There is a script for each of us but who is writing it 

is the question. 

The wealthiest of man  can see the joy in the 

smallest of things or is that poor man who 

is now wealthy because he does feel the joy?

Emotionally tired is like giving up.

One moment wasted is one to many. 

Prayer is positive energy. 

Choices is like a game of chutes and ladders, 

sometimes we go up and other times we are sliding down. 

Fifteen years can be a young person whole life and a

old persons end of life. 

On a clear day I can see forever but the days

haven't been to clear lately. 

Love and hate are both strong emotions 

that once seeded are quite powerful. 

We all have wants and needs 

that is simplicity of our animal drive. 

Watching the sunrise on the beach 

is one of my most beautiful memories, 

mostly because I carry you in my heart.

Living life over again means you lived with regrets,

I have no regrets. 

The gift of life is indeed brief.

Scattered thoughts and yet they always bring me back to you.

Dreams just might be our alternate reality. 

Touch

The ducks are a quacking 

and the willow quickly grew 

nostalgic thoughts on the mind

as they had me race to you.

Laughter and tears from day to day, 

shared moments in a special way.

Smiling as I hold on tight 

to the joy and love of my life.

Adventures only we can share

right down to just underwear. 

Emotions that I almost forgot

and the temp is getting hot. 

I saw you clearly in my dream

we shared the day wonderfully,

might have been your promise of eternity 

as I felt you reach out and touch me. 

 

Grasp

 These lingering emotions 

appear in my dreams, 

as if you are there and 

still haunting me.

In my dream it was just a game

that two people play, 

and I loved every silly moment,

that's locked in my mine. 

My emotions have gone wild,

filled with your energy.

Cross fear and contentment

in a full range of disbelief.

 

~

Time brings an awareness,

to see life differently, 

it all makes a whole lot of sense, 

separating reality from dreams.

Some people use the moment

and others play the fool, 

when casting the players 

there is no certain rules. 

It might be just a page

in a chapter of life's book,

but it leaves within an imprint

like a copy of a scrapbook.

Is it baggage we take with us

or a story to leave behind?

Maybe it's just lessons 

that through the soul entwines.

The chill causes a quiver

one that we can't shake,

reminders of a lifetime

and a mountain of  mistakes.

From early on we find 

the flaws of humanity,

and the simple hunger

that brings us to our knees.

The universe reveals

how minute we are, 

not much different than 

the wild animals at heart. 

Gathering like Chipmunks

hanging on to the past,

the further we move ahead

the stronger it's grasp.

 Waking up early each morn

to a chill like never before, 

one thought or a song or two 

as my mind turns to you. 

Wondering what you are doing

and where you are right now, 

as I go about daydreaming 

I try to hide this silly smile.

The days are limited 

each one surely a gift, 

with each passing moment

your love gives me a lift. 

~

No blue birds at the window,

happiness is a distance away.

I tried to block the thoughts

as if my soul was simply lost. 

no blue birds at the window. 

No tears from these eyes, 

as that part of me as died. 

I'm not counting days 

I'm going on my way, 

no tears from these eyes.

Fairytale

 Flipping through the book of life,

blocking out the pages that make me cry. 

Taking tomorrow by surprise 

to quickly ease this troubled mind. 

I didn't expect what I'd find 

who wrote this script of mine?

I am sure it wasn't left to choice

like a song bird without a voice. 

If I truly held the pen 

I'd be there with you my friend, 

all the days have passed on by 

and I built a brick wall out of time. 

~

Holding on to the good times 

brushing away the darkness of life, 

wondering if that sun will shine again

or if this story has come to and end?

Sighing in disbelief 

was it was a want or a need?

It felt so surreal but I am sure

it was based on a fairytale. 

Impossible

 Impossible dreams as 

only in the night are you mine, 

I wake up each morning and

I face the solitude of time. 

I wanted to believe it so

that your arms were for only me,

but I realized a little bit late 

that I was never on your mind. 

The sequence of the story 

jumped through a chapter or two,

still blurred by the heartache 

a decade of love has passed through.

Maybe a lesson for fools

who believe that we can have it all,

but the truth lay down before us 

with a reminder of the limits that

once had me in awl.

I settled for the impossible 

even if it's only in my dreams,

there is where I'll find you 

based on my memories. 

~

The treasure is when I first met you 

it gave me the power to believe in the heavens blue, 

from the moment I experienced all that could be, 

I fell asleep in a life long dream. 

The Importance

 Time rules each moment

there is nothing we can do,

and when the heavens call 

we'll be passing through. 

Take hold of each memory 

and hold it so ever near, 

as the celebration is in life

and all that we share. 

I thought about each person

that simply crossed my path 

and only one held on and that's

the beauty in how long its last.

Facing reality 

whether want or need, 

you continued to hold my hand

bringing joy to me. 

Devil makes a play

 Sun shining down on the hills

and the wind above is blowing 

but the trees are standing still,

as I watch a hawk fly over the 

field. 

The season is approaching rather fast

 fluctuating like fractured glass, 

sliver of glass to the skin is a reminder 

of the pain the past let's in. 

~

You don't always understand

 when the devils hand is played.

trickery at its best when the

darkness is engaged. 

Believing or wanting 

the fool takes the stand, 

when you see what you see

is a part of some evil plan. 

Traveling down this road

I've traveled before 

but this is a little different

as I know what's in store.

~

 

 

Happiness

 I saw that chance at happiness

your hand firmly in mine, 

like a raft thrown out at sea

those moments rescued me. 

We took the reigns of time,

each day a blessing of sort.

From that first day I met you

I felt your love support. 

It is the tea cup in the morning, 

the caring throughout the day,

simple words of love 

and the happiness they bring.

Time

 I wanna love you 

and I wanna care, 

but my heart is broken 

and it teeters on fear.

I want you to love me,

and I want you to care, 

but the time has passed

and you aren't here. 

No chance that fate

could change this path, 

for it really is time 

that is having the last laugh. 

Unconditionally

 Unconditionally, what does that really mean?

To love and be loved forever and completely 

accepting all that we are deep down in our heart,

as we stay united and promise to never part. 

When time passes by and grey hair falls in my eyes

and a wrinkle or two has made its way through,

you'll still hold my hand and my heart command

as if it was like that very first day.

Sometimes I think the dreams 

were never ever meant to be, 

but just a game of two 

that brings me in the night to you.

I have seen you there and

wondered what was left to share?

Did time hold the key or was it

just a passing thing?

A part of me as truly died. 

Through the Words

 Through the words I ran away, 

left behind the dark of day, 

to the clouds passing by 

escaping the hands of time. 

Releasing the evil reign

where it no longer stays, 

setting free and letting go,

the mind no longer the game. 

Weep not heart of sorrow past, 

he who stands begins to laugh, 

like chalk written on the wall

erasing it one and for all.